Dealing With Being Sick in Recovery

I do not get sick often. Actually I always brag about how I do not get sick. LOL! That’s because when I was drinking I was never sick, just drunk. And if I felt sick, I  just had a few drinks and I was cured, or at least I no longer felt any pain that my sickness was causing. So, the only time I felt sick was when I was hungover. And of course there was a cure for that too, yep you guessed it, just a few more drinks.
sick

In sobriety, I found that I don’t have the patience for being sick at all, I just want to get better and right now! I usually take some over the counter meds and go on with my day. There is no stopping for being sick.

But this time was different. I think I literally ran myself into the ground. It got so horrible, that it reminded me of the way I felt when I was detoxing from my last drunk. I was nauseous, shaky, hot and cold, stuffed up, and had a pounding headache. I literally couldn’t function.

The first day I was sick, I went to Target and found myself buying any and all the medicine that I thought might be helpful – because I am problem solver and this is a problem and medicine is the solution. So I stood in front of the cold aisle and had a conversation with myself on how I could get NyQuil with the 10% alcohol and secretly take it, with the hope that all my aches would instantaneously go away, because you know, alcohol takes all the pain away. But I shook that feeling off and I didn’t get it. So instead, not really knowing what sickness I had, I bought allergy medicine, cold medicine, flu medicine, and a case of Gatorade! I was sure that something in that mix was bound to work. When I got home, thinking first that I had severe allergies, I took some allergy medicine. But after a few hours I wasn’t feeling any better and in my mind I really, just wanted to take everything at once, and just knock myself out. I didn’t want to feel anything anymore. This seemed so very familiar – it actually scared me.

Then I called my doctor but unfortunately the doctor’s office was closed for Easter holiday weekend. After few more hours with no relief, I took some cold medicine. Then, when that didn’t help, I just continued to take the over the counter medicine, throughout the day, all in hopes that some combination of it would finally give me some relief. But I still felt horrible! I actually though at one point that well, I know that I am not hungover now, maybe I wasn’t hungover that last time I drank either, maybe I was just sick. That would mean that all the times I thought that I was hungover, I was just sick! That might means that I was not an alcoholic after all! What!? I’ve gone nuts! UGH. Crazy mind…

By Sunday morning I felt even worse, and started thinking that I had some mayor disease, or a tumor! In a panic, I got in the car and drove straight to the 24h Urgent Care clinic. After being examined for about 10 minutes, the doctor informed me that I had a severe viral infection, aka – the common cold! A cold!? What? That can’t be! Just a cold?! Sheesh!

The prescription was some caught syrup, nasal decongestant, Mucinex and rest.

REST!?

sleeping
I don’t do rest. I don’t think I have rested at all in the last six years. I don’t know how to rest. There are too many things to do – 3 kids, a full time job, lots of house work, and blogging, and recovery, and… it’s been none stop. Rest… I just don’t do.

I came home and took all the prescribed meds and sat on the couch hoping that magically I would feel better in a matter of minutes. As you can imagine… that didn’t happen. Oh what to do with myself!? I am sure that most people must know how to rest. But me? I have no clue. What do you do when you rest? Seriously!? I had to Google it! LOL!

I tried to rest but I was still restless.

Then I had that moment… that moment when you come to terms with your situation. That moment when you finally see what you have been doing, and why it was not working, and what you really need to do. I finally had the moment of clarity.

I am sick. I need to rest. That’s it. That’s all.

Here it was! Acceptance, letting it go, turning it over, whatever you call it, comes in so many forms! And I surely needed it right then! Because it just was not happening fast enough for me. But once I found that place of acceptance I was able to move toward the solution. And even being sick, I needed to let go of wanting to be better right away and accept the fact that I am sick and I just need to rest.

How do you deal with being sick in recovery?


If you, or anyone you know, is struggling with alcohol addiction, please click the Find Support link for an extensive list of support groups. Also please check out the links to many useful resources in the sidebar, and always feel free to contact me anytime at sobercourage@gmail.com.

You may also find some great inspiration and support from all the awesome sober bloggers listed in the side bar under POSTS I LIKE and RECOVERY BLOGGERS, as well as Sober Courage page on Facebook and Sober Courage on Twitter.

Advertisements

8 Comments Add yours

  1. This made me laugh! I don’t rest either unless I get so sick that I have no choice, which is a kind of choice because not resting in the first place leads to sickness. Mished-Up’s post today talked about radical self care. What a concept!

    Like

    1. Hi Karen! There will be no rest here! Lol! Such a difficult concept huh? But I feel like it was a sign fir sure. I haven’t been this sick in a long time. I was definitely thinking that I was dying. Finding out that it was just a cold!? Sheesh! Just too funny. Thanks Karen! Hugs.

      I read mishedup’s post, it’s awesome!

      Like

  2. lastbottle says:

    I just want to drink and make it go away. Day two headache, extreme exhaustion and feeling like in want to crawl out of my skin!!!

    Like

    1. I am sorry you feel crappy! I hate being sick for sure. But hang in there, you will get better and sooner without alcohol! Alcohol will only make you feel better for a short time, then you will feel worse. It’s jot worth it.

      Sending many hugs and warm get well soon wishes. 🙂

      Like

      1. lastbottle says:

        Thank you Maggie for caring enough for replying, your blog helped me to understand what was happening to me and knowing that helps me from jumping ship. I did start to feel better last night and knowing it will pass helps. Thanks again, hugs received !!!!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Dan H says:

    Thank you I really appreciate that you shared this. I am currently sick with the same symptoms and tried the same solutions (problem solver here too). I got so frustrated that I couldn’t keep up my regular routine (even though I tried and ran my self into a wall of fever driven insanity) that I found my crazy mind going in circles like our described. After reading this I feel like I just went to a meeting and can accept my illness and rest. Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Good fro you!! I hope that you are feeling better! Sending big hug!

      Like

Share your Sober Courage here!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s