Oh, sometimes I hate that cheesy saying (LOL!), and sometimes I hate when someone uses it as a topic for a meeting! BUT it also never fails to get me out of a bad mood, or sadness, or self-pity, or even huge bouts of fear. Of course it is always easier to be positive and grateful when things go my way than when everything seems to be falling apart! And lately it seems like every day something falls completely apart!
But it is Thanksgiving time, so I am doing my best to stay grateful through this difficult time in my life. And as it may be, my list has become full of the simplest imaginable things since I often feel so much despair that honestly it is hard to stay positive.
I am trying to speak to myself as if I were my best friend! Instead of scolding myself for everything that went wrong and all my bad decisions, I am trying to talk to myself as I would do to a friend that I care a whole great deal about. Nevertheless, it is hard at times, and I really have to focus on the little things in life that I often take for granted.
Even a little gratitude for what I do have and the positive changes that are happening even while going through a divorce, can make a huge difference in my perspective on life and my future. I am trying to turn it all around and use my frustration and pain to motivate me. After all, I am in control of the way I look at my life.
I have also really worked hard to distance myself from those who bring me down, remembering that friends and family members should motivate, inspire and respect me. My circle should be well-rounded and supportive. Quality over quantity, always!
What also is helping is my favorite saying – Stay where your feet are! This saying reminds me to stay in the moment – and in this exact moment! My thoughts and the people who I choose to spend my time on, in any given 24 hours, can strongly influence my feelings for that day—bright and happy, or murky and disheartened.
So, I have been doing a morning gratitude list and I start by looking down at my feet!
- I am grateful for having shoes on my feet.
- I am grateful for my comfy socks.
- I am grateful for my feet that carry me from place to place.
- I am grateful for my legs that hold up my body.
- I am grateful for my body which has been holding up pretty well through the stress and the pain.
- I am grateful for my clothes that keep me warm.
- I am grateful for my eyes which can see the amazing beauty of the world.
- I am grateful for my hair which keeps my head warm.
Then I continue with the things I have, to remind myself that my world is not actually falling apart:
- I have beautiful kids who are healthy and happy.
- I have my family who is always just a phone call away.
- I have many amazing friends.
- I have a house with all the necessary things in it.
- My fridge has food in it.
- I have a car.
- I have a job.
- I am alive!
I have to strive to find and keep my gratitude, even when it is as elusive as ever. I know that no one is cheerful and ecstatic all the time, but with a little practice, I can definitely find many things to be grateful for. I also know that being sober, all by itself is a huge reason to be grateful!!
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